A Picture Tells a Thousand Words

Last week during Orientation the Communications Director took a candid picture of me. It turned out to be a really good picture, so I forwarded a copy to Mom. She posted it on her Facebook page about half a day before I made it my profile picture. A flood of comments posted on Facebook and in emails soon followed. Many folks commented that they have not seen me look so happy and relaxed in a long time. One friend even said that she couldn’t conjure up a picture of me in such a good place, and Mom noted that I have not appeared this happy in at least five years.

Ding! Ding! Ding! That friend is one I met through my work at the Episcopal Church Center and has seen me primarily in the context of that work and during my long period of unemployment. The five year period? That’s about the time the first of the reorganizations went into effect at the Church Center, followed by three more reorganizations, the elimination of my position, and 16 months of unemployment. The amount of change that occurred during those five years left many of us who worked there with whiplash.

Change. Not long after I started working at the Church Center I visited a palm reader at one of the Renaissance Faires Rachel and I went to regularly. I held out my hands, and she gently pulled my thumbs away from the rest of my fingers. “You don’t handle change very well,” she said. Over the years I would stop and see her now and again. Each time she performed the same exercise, and over the years my hands became more and more relaxed. “You’re learning to handle change,” she’d say. Of course, handling all the change going on didn’t mean the stress of change disappeared. It took an emotional toll.

Then came the biggest change I’ve had to handle in a long time. I moved to Virginia to take a new job. In the space of three weeks I went from being asked to interview to accepting the position. From acceptance to starting I had 40 days to pack up my belongings and move. A lot of change in a very short amount of time.

When I went off to the University of Wisconsin-Madison I imagined that I would eventually end up at an academic institution, although as faculty. During the last bout of unemployment my outplacement counselor and I talked about possible options in the travel and hospitality field, though not at an academic institution. For many years my path looked as if I might end up at a seminary, but as a student. Now I am the Hospitality and Guest Residence Manager at Virginia Theological Seminary.

Which is amusing given all of the above but particularly in light of my decision last year to finally say to myself and to everyone else that I was DONE with the ordination process. The fact that I held off submitting completed paperwork for over a year was probably my biggest clue. It has felt very liberating to no longer be on that path. Yet I end up at a seminary. God does have a sense of humor.

So the picture tells the story of moving on, change, and new beginnings. It tells the story in ways words cannot. I'm rather enjoying this new chapter in my story. Can you tell?

The Yankee Starts a New Year

The calendar may say mid-August, but signs of fall have begun appearing. The days gradually grow shorter. On campus we see the first signs of the new school year. Juniors have arrived for Orientation and August Term, and returning middlers and seniors trickle back. The Fall Semester begins the Tuesday after labor Day. After years of unlearning the academic calendar, my new job has immersed me in it.

Although the methods of higher education show all the signs of adapting to new technology, the school year still begins in August or September and ends in May or June. Families buy new clothes and supplies. College students pack up their belongings. As long as residential schools exist we will probably continue to have the familiar academic calendar.

And so the new students begin the process of settling in and making the campus their own. Empty dorm rooms take on new personalities. A lone figure practices hurling (the sport, people, the sport!) on the Grove. Students sit on benches talking on their cell phones to friends or family back home or struggling with the unfamiliar alphabets of Greek and Hebrew. They trade their stories with the others with whom they will share the next two or three years of their lives. While the Seminary forms them, they also form the Seminary. Another generation in a long line.

But even here at the Seminary working within a changing church and changing world gradually expands the calendar, and for more than just than academics. As part of the Hospitality team I work with both internal and external groups plan and implement programs, meetings, and conferences held on our campus. How do we meet the needs of all of our constituents, both internal and external? How do those different groups interact and where? All of this while working within the context of the Seminary's mission.

However, the calendar says August. The new students have arrived. It must be the beginning of a new year!

A Visit to Hope United Church of Christ

I was not always an Episcopalian. My brother and I were baptized in the Episcopal Church, but my parents left the church for various reasons when we were very young. We grew up unchurched. I found my my own way to a church community during college. Rockford College, founded by the Congregational Church in 1847, has a UCC chaplain even though it is no longer affiliated with the denomination. When I went to grad school in Madison, Wisconsin, I joined First Congregational Church and remained a nominal UCC member after returning to Connecticut. I visited a few UCC churches but never found one that met my needs at that point in my life. Eventually I visited Grace at the invitation of a friend and rather quickly became an active member.

Since moving to Alexandria I've visited a number of the many Episcopal Churches in the city and the surrounding area. In the three-and-a-half months I've been here, I'd not seen a United Church of Christ church during my explorations. So this weekend I decided to see if I could locate one. The Internet is a wonderful thing, and I quickly found Hope United Church of Christ, which is a short drive south.

I arrived about 15 minutes before the service and found a parking lot in need of care and a church that looked like a large concrete box. However, the greeting at the door was warm, and I ended up with children's name tag because they couldn't find the regular visitors' tags. As the former Children's Ministries Officer, that worked for me. I entered the sanctuary to find lots of wood and movable pews. I was particularly struck the baptismal font that stood to one side of the table. A wood base served as a table for a white ceramic bowl and pitcher. I also saw a Pascal Candle standing in one corner.

By the time the 10:30 service started the sanctuary, which looks like it would hold about 100 worshippers, was about half full, including a dozen children. I was among the older people there; a very different experience than the churches I've visited so far. On the other hand, like all of the churches I've visited so far the congregation was overwhelmingly white. The church also lists itself as a "God is Still Speaking" and "Open and Affirming" church, so there was no doubt that I would be welcome there.

Their pastor is on vacation, so the Christian Education Minister led the service, which was preceded by the announcements. As today was the second Sunday of the month, the worship was what Episcopalians know as the Service of the Word. Communion takes place only on the first Sunday of the month. While all the elements are there, the order was a little different: the Call to Worship (Opening Sentences), a hymn, Prayer of Confession, Words of Assurance, Passing of the Peace, Proclaiming the Good News, Offering, Prayers, a final hymn, and finally the Benediction. The Children's Message, although based on the Gospel reading, came before the scripture readings. When it was done, the children went to Sunday School, and the adults remained for readings from the Gospel and the Epistle for the day. Another lay person gave the sermon.

The prayers were titled "Responding with Prayers, Actions, and Hopes", and were very much prayers of the people. Beginning with Joys and moving on to Concerns, people raised their hands, called on by the leader, and spoke briefly about their thanksgiving or request for prayers. The congregation was much more involved in the worship at Hope than in some of the UCC churches I've visited over the past few years. I found it interesting that this congregation uses the "trespasses" version of the Lord's Prayer, though the leader announces that everyone should pray in their own way.

In spite of the fact that they began the Lord's Prayer with "Our Father", this congregation has fully embraced the inclusive language movement. They use The New Century Hymnal along with a supplementary hymnal, which is in a notebook. So while the hymn tunes were familiar, I stumbled a bit over the unfamiliar, if greatly appreciated, wording.

The congregation also takes hospitality seriously. There were two other visitors in addition to me. I'm sure the other two also received personal invitations to join the meal (coffee hour) after the service, as all three of us went. People greeted us and engaged us in conversation, but no one pried or was pushy about possibly joining. They rate right up there with St. Clement's in terms of being a welcoming church.

Occasionally I feel the pull to revisit the UCC. First Congregational Church Madison, Wisconsin, or probably more accurately my memory of it, is pretty much the standard by which I judge other congregations of any denomination. But in terms of liturgy and most theology, I really am at home in the Episcopal Church.

A Visit to The Falls Church

This morning I drove Route 7 (King Street, Leesburg Pike, Broad Street) to Falls Church to attend worship at The Fall Church. It is another of the historic parishes in the area, and it has memorial pew markers for both George Washington and Robert E. Lee. More recently the parish became the center of controversy as a breakaway congregation attempted to take the property with it when it left the Episcopal Church. The courts ruled in favor of the Diocese of Virgina, and the property was recently returned. A new rector has been selected and will start soon.

I arrived just before the 10:15 service began. A table with name tags and bulletins was set up at the bottom of the steps leading up to the Historic Church. An Usher made sure you were greeted and that you filled out a name tag. Inside a Greeter shook my hand and addressed me by name. Yes, I had a name tag on, but it means that people are paying attention. About 50 people were in the pews when the service started, and by the first reading there were more than 60. Not bad for a summer Sunday. There were a number of young children including infants ranging in age from a couple of weeks to a few months. I saw no sign of older children or teenagers.

After the sermon there was a children's moment. They have a small basket where one or more of the children can put an object. That object then becomes the subject of the children's moment. Today it was a small pink Etch-a-Sketch. On the whole it wasn't as bad as some I've observed, but it still felt like what Mom calls Putting Our Children on Display. The Announcements included a reminder about a meeting to discuss the implementation of a Sunday School program.

The Peace took quite a while. Some folks did make their way around most of the church. Others stayed in the pews. I did overhear a number of conversations that went beyond "Peace", or "How are you?" I know many people that deplore the way the Peace drags on in some churches, but we are a community, and this is one of the ways we share in that community. I think the larger problem is when the Announcements drag on forever, which it did seem like here. On the other hand, there was a lot of important information to communicate, and they obviously wanted visitors and newcomers to get to coffee hour, etc.

On the way out of the church a couple of people commented on my shirt (the dark blue one, Mom). Coffee hour was held in a large room closer to what I assumed is the newer larger worship space. There was a nice variety of snacks, including some healthy choices. These kinds of things are often an introvert's nightmare. However, once filled my plate and got something to drink, I made my way to a table where a couple of people were sitting. After we exchanged perfunctory greetings, they went back to their conversation and pretty much ignored me. Another woman joined us, but once she sat down, she also fell silent and ignored me.

This is a church that is in recovery and rebuild mode. They've been through a protracted legal battle, during which they worshipped elsewhere. One would think that they would want to be a welcoming community. Alas, like so many Episcopal Churches, we stick to ourselves.

This whole search process may need to progress to another level. I might have to go and interview them!

The Yankee Buys Furniture

Last Saturday I drove over (up?) to Del Ray, which is north of Old Town. I think. I'm still trying to figure out directions around here. Generally the water, the Potomac River, is to the east. After years in Connecticut where Long Island Sound is to the south, it messes with my sense of direction. Not to mention that Route 1 and I95 actually run north and south here rather east and west as they do as they pass through Connecticut. But I'll save my directionally challenged story for another time.

Last Saturday I drove to Del Ray to stop in at Not Too Shabby Consignments. It's one of those places you need to keep checking for something you might want. I've been searching for a small table to go just inside the front door. I meandered through the shop and as I turned back toward the front, there it was, right next to the shop's front door. My table. It had been there long enough that it had been marked down twice. It was the right size and the right price. It's not an antique, but it is a good sturdy piece of furniture. I bought it and took it home. It fits just where I thought it would.

Today I FINALLY drove to the Ikea store in Woodbridge and bought the chair I've wanted for a long time. Of course, just like driving on I95 back in Connecticut on a Saturday, I encountered traffic. It took me over an hour to make what should have been a 25 minute drive. Ikea stores look pretty much the same wherever you find them. I went to the chair section and noted the locations for the chair, the stool, and the cushions for both. Then I backtracked to couches because there was a sectional I wanted to look at. Comfortable, but it may not be what I want for my living room. So now the chair I didn't have room for in my last apartment graces my living room here.

I chose the brown frames and brown cushions because they work with the colors in the living room. As it turns out, they look good with my rocker, which I've had since I was 15. There's something about buying furniture. Some of my friends call it part of the nesting process. But it's also a sense of security. The table at Not Too Shabby had been in the shop about as long as I've been in Alexandria. I didn't see it until last weekend. Until today, something always seemed to come up that prevented me getting down to Ikea.

At some level, I may have been waiting until I had my three month review. Even though I knew it would be fine, even though people have been telling me all along that I'm doing a good job, there was something about passing that milestone. I'm here for a while. Even though I've only been here three months, I feel a sense of permanence I never really felt in my last apartment. Or at the Church Center during the last few years of my employment there.

I'm enjoying looking for furniture. I'm making my apartment more and more my home. In time Alexandria will be, too.

90 Days

It is hard to believe that six months ago this wasn't even a blip on my radar screen. Less than five months ago I had my first interview, and during the 40 days between acceptance and start date I packed up everything and moved south.

When the job hunt process started almost two years ago I said relocation was an option. South, however, was not a direction that crossed my mind. I pictured Boston, Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis, and even Spokane (although Spokane probably would have meant major culture shock). But here I am in Alexandria, VA. From the shadow of New York City to the shadow of Washington, DC.

In some ways living in the shadow of Washington, DC, isn't much different from living in the shadow of New York City. District events dominate the news. Most important social and cultural events appear to take place in the District. Large numbers of people commute into the District for work.

I, on the other hand, have the the shortest commute of my professional life. For the first four weeks I made a two minute walk across campus from the temporary guest house. Now it's 35 steps from the front door of my apartment to my office door. Because my colleagues all work in different buildings, I walk much more than I did for any other job.

So here I am having completed my first 90 days as the Hospitality and Guest Residence Manager for Virginia Theological Seminary. I had a good review, and I feel like I'm making a positive contribution. I'm taking the first steps in building an expanded professional network that reflects this new job. I have friends that check in to make sure that I get off campus.

Having friends living in this area made the decision to move to Alexandria easier. But along with my professional network, I'm having to build a new social network, which is probably the more difficult process. Not to mention finding a new church. It's not going to happen overnight, but eventually this will start to feel like home.

And for 90 days in, I think I've made a good start.