New Year's Eve Musings

Another winter day, another snowstorm. At least I'm on vacation and don't have to travel in it.

Another New Year's Eve, the end of another year. I can't say this past year has been one of the more pleasant ones. I spent most of it on probation at work. Actually, a lot of employees at the Church Center spent time on probation this year. Is that a management problem or an employee problem? The transition has been rough, but hopefully, we're through the worst of it and moving into some real ministry work. Or maybe just further into a corporate structure. Occasionally, I wonder what would happen if we disbanded the Church Center.

This time of year is often bittersweet. Christmas, followed by the New Year, followed by my birthday. I usually find myself in a period of self-reflection, and if I'm in a particularly bad place, that self-reflection can spiral into depression. It doesn't have to, and I've learned to catch myself talking myself into a depression.

This video is of an ABBA song that is nearly 30 years old. It captures my mood pretty well, and it does have a hopeful note.



The coming year will be one of change. I'm not one to make New Year's Resolutions, as that just sets oneself up for failure. But there will be changes. Hopefully, most of the changes will be positive and/or constructive--personally and professionally.

Blessings for the New Year.

Peace,
Jeff
(274.5)

New Music

One of my Christmas presents this year was a Music Minus One Flute packet of Woodwind Quintets (volume 1). They are taken from recordings made in 1970 by the Camerata Woodwind Quintet of Western Illinois University and have had the flute part deleted, so you can play with the recording. This had been on my Amazon.com wish list for a couple of years, so I was excited when I opened the package from Rachel and saw what it was.

Sunday night I finally opened the book and took a look at the music. For a middling amateur, the printed sheet music looked a little intimidating. But then I remembered that a few years ago I sight read through two Mozart Divertimenti with a professional oboist and a child prodigy violinist. If I could do that, then I should be able to play these. On the other hand, I hadn't picked up my flute in weeks (probably more like months). Playing/practicing often takes a back seat when I don't have a gig or someone(s) to just jam with. So this evening I pulled out my flute and played for about 20 minutes. One of the pieces I worked on was the first movement of J.S. Bach's Partita in a minor for solo flute (BWV 1013).

This video from YouTube shows someone playing the Allemande on a baroque flute.



After finding the video of the Bach piece, I went looking on YouTube of videos of some of the pieces in the Music Minus One packet. I found this video of some high school students playing the first movement of the Haydn Divertimento in b flat major. (Don't cringe, it's actually in tune and better than the other video of the same piece that I found!)



Then I put the CD in to hear the quintet--minus the flute--play. Suddenly, the printed music doesn't seem so intimidating, and tomorrow I'll try sight reading the Haydn, and maybe even some of the other pieces.

I forget what a joy it is to make music, even just playing for myself. It changes the vibrations in the apartment, much like frequent prayer affects a space. It lightens my spirits. I need to remember to do this on a regular basis, because it also helps me cope with stress. And given the way things are at work...

Peace,
Jeff

New Boxes

I finished three more boxes. They were among the things that I scrambled to move out of the way of the water during the plumbing mishap the other week. I had the various pieces spread out on the floor to dry after applying a coat of paint.

This is Mom's birthday present. Obviously, I didn't finish it in time for her birthday. Since I gave it to her about halfway between her birthday and Christmas, I wrote "Meppy Birthmas! Or is that Harry Chrisday?" in the card. The image is from a painting of the Madonna and Child portrayed as Native Americans. The body of the box is a darker shade of purple, and I chose the colors to fit in her prayer space--not to mention that purple is one of her favorite colors.


This one I made for Lois. I didn't have to tell her that the picture is of Julian of Norwich.


I made this one for my friend Rachel. The picture shows a sacred well in a forest setting.


Each box contained two white tea lights and a fabric square to be used as an altar cloth. There is room for other sacred objects to be placed in the box--portable sacred space.

I have one more started and four waiting for ideas.

Peace,
Jeff

Winter Arrives, Advent Ends, Insecurity Abides

Winter began today, but we've already had two snowstorms, Friday's a major one. We expected more today, but we ended up with rain. If it had been snow, we would have been buried like further north--a friend of mine said they had close to 14" in Danbury.

I'm done with Winter. I'm ready for Spring.

The problem is that there is no Spring without Winter. No Easter without Good Friday. No Good Friday without Christmas. No Christmas without the Annunciation. No Annunciation without... All the way back to the Creation, and no Creation without God.

I've been having a "where is God in all of this" year. Discerning about my job. Discerning about the parish. Discerning about a call to ordained ministry. Everything is up in the air; life is in flux, and yet things seem stuck. As I look at what is going on in the church--the parish, the denominational headquarters, the Episcopal Church, the Anglican Communion, and the larger Church--I find myself asking again and again, "God, what are you thinking!?!? Why me, and why now?"

And yet, every now and then, I get glimpses of the answers. Like this morning during Lois' sermon on the Annunciation:

Saying yes to God's call often means saying yes to Holy Insecurity.

Having hope means trusting that God has not forgotten the recipe for manna.

Of course, glimpses of the answers are more often than not immediately followed by the appearance of more questions. So for now I will work on learning to live in Holy Insecurity and to have hope.

Peace,
Jeff

The Great Water Disaster

Friday morning the 12th, I woke up at about 1:00 hearing dripping. This is not unusual, because I can usually hear dripping from the overhang outside when it rains. It took me a moment to realize that what I was hearing was INSIDE. I thought the storm had forced water into the chimney, so I'd have to get up and get something to put in the fireplace to catch the drips and call the management company in the morning. I turned on the light and saw the ceiling:

I scrambled to move my music bag (flute, recorders, whistles) and music stand from in front of the fireplace. Then I found I had to push the bed over. Followed by moving my nativity collection from the mantle. The dripping got worse, and I disassembled the bed while I phoned the management company's emergency number. Then I called Mom while moving the nightstand and lamp as the dripping spread. I put pots and bowls under the worst of the drips.


By the time Mom and Bill arrived, I was emptying bookshelves and dumping books in the small room. My apartment is 450 square feet, so you can imagine there isn't a lot of space to move anything to. Once the dripping seemed to stabilize, I packed the nativity sets back into the "Christmas Boxes" while Mom tried to organize piles so that we could at least move around a little.

The maintenance person showed up, and he and Bill went to go look where the problem was. The tenant on the second floor wasn't home, but it turned out that the water actually originated from the third floor, where one of the tenants was taking a shower. For TWO HOURS she'd been taking a shower! It turns out that they'd called Roto Rooter (or some similar company) to take care of a clogged drain instead of calling the management company. I've never had a problem with the management company coming when needed in a timely manner, so I don't know what the were thinking! The guy who came punched a hole in the drain, so as she showered.. and showered... and showered... the water drained into the ceiling of the second floor apartment, then poured through her floor and into my ceiling and down between the walls.


I also kept an eye on my clothes closet and the back hall. Good thing, because I saw water start to come through the closet, and Mom and I emptied it into the front common hall. Later I moved the contents of my closet to the back seat of my car.


I spent the next few days with my mother while they made repairs. They thought they'd be done Tuesday, but I wasn't able to move back into my apartment until Thursday the 18th. They had to replace the carpeting and treat and repaint the walls. In many ways, I was very lucky. If this had happened the week before while I was in California for a meeting, a lot my stuff would have sustained damaged. The only thing they will have to replace is my mattress, which I couldn't get far enough away to avoid being splashed.

I think the maintenance person was surprised at how calm I was--at least by the time he arrived I'd finished panicking. And that I wasn't flying off the handle at him. Sometimes a little respect and professional treatment goes a long way. It wasn't his fault, and he did get up at 1:30 in the morning to drive through a nasty rain storm to come and take care of the problem as much as he could. And he was back before 9:00 a.m. with other workers to start cleaning up and making repairs.

I still have to order the new mattress, the winter storms really messed up delivery schedules, so I said I'd call back after Christmas. I'll be at my brother's for the week, so it won't be a major problem. I have almost everything put away, and except for the lighter carpet, you can't really tell I had an indoor rainstorm.

A couple of interesting things appeared in the water stains. This one on the ceiling


and this weird one on the wall:


Once the new mattress is here, and the last of my stuff is put away, I'll ask Lois to come and do a house blessing.

Peace,
Jeff